Today we went to the Mother's Milk Bank of the Western Great Lakes to donate some of William's milk.
I weaned myself last week and had a bunch in the freezer that we hadn't delivered to the hospital. It was hard for us to go over there, but good. It felt good to see how William will continue to impact the world. Either through helping other Preemie babies and families by the milk donation, or by research that will be done on his milk that will continue to change Preemie protocol in health care.
This milk bank hasn't been around for too long, so I'm so glad it's an available resource to us. Plus, Jeff and I are relieved that William's milk won't have to go to waste (remember when I spilled the first full bottle of milk I pumped and cried for an hour afterward?).
Eventually, William's name will be memorialized on their Milky Way wall, as a baby whose milk helped other children.
The organization seems pretty cool, and the ladies over there were super nice.
In other news... we got our hands on a "W" car flag, so we flew that for a while on our car yesterday. Then we took it down because it made too many distracting noises while we were on the interstate...
We're flying the W in our apartment now and pass underneath it whenever we go into our living room.
I have been able to take some solid walks over the last few days, and I'm hoping to physically get back into shape by doing some yoga.
I tried my hand at playing violin a little bit for the first time yesterday at church. It felt REALLY weird to hold it. I haven't played since August sometime, so I'm also glad that my equipment is still in good working order.
My other crowning achievements of late include grocery shopping and cooking the occasional meal. And as helpful as it is to pour out my heart to the world via blog, I'm working on setting up grief counseling for myself.
Thank you to everyone who has continued to send prayers our way, and also for flowers and cards. We have trouble facing the cards every day, but are slowly working our way through them.
Hi Melissa! My name is Amy Hanson, I also attend Knox and have been following along with your story. I want you to know above anything else, you are most definitely not alone!! I know all too well the grief of losing a baby premature. My first daughter Adalyn Rose Hanson was born at 27 weeks 5 days at 1 pound 7 ounces due to my severe preeclampsia w/ HELLP syndrome last March 15, 2015. After a long 6 month fight, she unfortunately passed away August 23, 2015 in the NICU at Rush Hospital, where I also work as an infectious disease pharmacist.
ReplyDeleteI'm putting together a care package for you that I'll bring to Moms Bible study next Thursday. It's a few things that helped me through the grieving process, I hope it helps you too. You sound like an absolutely amazing person, and I'm looking forward to meeting you and your husband one day. I know also all too well that people reaching out is super overwhelming. I get it. Feel free to reach out to me 24/7 at any moment, or not at all! Or maybe in a few days, weeks, months or years - whenever you feel ready. I have Moms that lost their children that I'm Facebook friends with that we haven't ever talked on the phone yet, but we read each others posts - especially when its a birthday for our child in Heaven, etc - and I find it comforting to know I'm not alone in this "new normal" and daily struggle that is living in your new reality without your son alive with you to hold in your arms. I also held Addie and read Psalm 23 to her when she passed away in my arms, and my husbands name is Jeff, so as you can image I was balling my eyes out (actually pumping at work!) when I read that William had passed. I was pumping because I was blessed enough to have a rainbow baby Kylie Rose Hanson, who's now 3.5 months old. I know its very soon for that, but she's been such a light in my life and I pray for the same for you, if that's what you would like too. Feel free to reach out - again no pressure because I've been there and I 100% understand. cell: 6306053881
I should have also mentioned - our angels names William and Adalyn ("Addie") will also be together on the Milky Way wall! I donated 40 gallons of milk to 2 milk banks - Ohio and the new one Western Great Lakes. Your gift of pumping is lifesaving for other premature babies, another kinda cool bond we share I think. Congrats!
ReplyDeleteStill praying for you and Jeff, happy to help in any way. And I really appreciate reading your blog and hearing of the things you are doing to honor William and his memory. I've found I have needed to do things to honor my parents after their passing. This remembrance is a blessing God gives us ... - DaveJ
ReplyDelete